Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I can read

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Uber taps AI firm Wayve to pilot fully driverless rides in the UK - CNBC

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

FAMU AD accused of stealing $24K from old job - ESPN

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Do most narcissists have good intentions as long as you are under their control?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

What are the causes of over sweating?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

How to watch Apple’s WWDC 2025 keynote - TechCrunch

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I understand how hurricane paths work

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Jimmy Buffett's Wife Files to Remove Co-Trustee on $275 Million Estate - Variety

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t buy bullshit

I have complete contempt for fakery

What are your darkest taboo confessions?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

New Research Reveals the Brain Learns Differently Than We Thought - SciTechDaily

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I’ve often wondered why fans aren’t deployed on GBBO during warm weather? I’ve seen too many desserts melt (and bakers too…). (I live in Pompano Beach and we try to use fans in lieu of AC as much as possible).

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Can we state Alia Bhatt as the most versatile actress in Bollywood now?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I actually pay taxes

I can count

What are the most common signs that a partner will cheat before it happens?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Why were the Japanese soldiers in WW II so hesitant to surrender in battle?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I see through liars

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I have complete contempt for traitorism